Self Sabotage needs to stop

This week has not been good eating wise...I think I am very hormonal right now, and while not a great excuse, it has definitely affected my mood, appetite and craving for sweets. I have just felt really down the last few days. besides being emotional, I am getting really concerned about my job given impending lay offs, am feeling upset/worried about my family being together for Christmas and how much I want everyone to be together, accidently letiting a friends secret slip, etc...to say I have been out of control eating this week is probably an understatement, but thank goodness for my band to help me put a stop to some of it. only because this is my accountability journal, I will say that I bought a roll of cookie dough...and over four days, i baked a few cookies each night and finished the roll. i want to kick myself as I type..how backward and old habits is that..embarrassing...how could I let myself lose 87 pounds only to try to sabotage myself. this is on top of pizza for dinner, nachos for lunch and many cookies and candy during the day at work for the holidays...these past two days are not ME because the new ME is putting herself first, thinking before eating and eating for hunger, not the mind or feelings....I have no where to go but up (in terms of improving, not gaining weight!) and I can and will do it. I will start now, not in a week like the old days...back to the focus...not a fun post, but needed and now I have been honest, despite some shame/embarrasment...I can do it.