A great weekend..and some interesting perspective

So, after my last post, I am feeling much better. I did not let it keep me down and forged on. I had an absolute great weekend, including seeing Going the Distance (love), going to dinner with my friend's parents in from FL, Jersey Boys on Broadway, a zillion errands (and I am not good at doing errands) that I walked to in the city (about 1.5hours of walking), Church and the US Open...I ate pretty well (all with people who do not know about my band), sans the chicken fingers and fries at the Open..note to self to bring something from home to eat next time...

I am really starting to feel overall better and this weight loss has really helped..I am by no means comfortable, but feeling a desire to do things again and more like myself..it is such a great feeling because I am someone who has always embraced life and I was missing that over the last year. I fit fairly comfortably in the Open and Broadway Seats, going through the turn style to get into the Open was fine, I am feeling prettier and wanting to get dressed up...just nice to reflect on feeling better..

So tonight, my big bro was in the city for a conference and we went to dinner. He was (and always is) so sweet and supportive. He religiously reads my blog (and has read many others), wants to be a part of every step, asks for posts, etc..also wanted to order and pace his eating so it was band friendly..He is just amazing...He told me how beautiful I looked and he said I looked so great and he could really tell my loss, especially in my face (it has been ~35 pounds since I last saw him). We ended up going to dinner at ABCKitchen, a newer restaurant in the city that I have really been wanting to try. It is a Farm to Table restaurant (uses local ingredients, veggies from local farms) and has a great decor/vibe. The meal was pretty good (i would say a 6 out of 10), but the food paled in comparison to the company/seeing my brother.

Needless to say, we had a VERY open conversation...many things that will have to be included in future posts because it is too much for just one, but one of the biggest things that I (more he) noticed was that it was hard for me to accept the compliments..even with my brother, who i am 100% comfortable with, I got somewhat embarrassed accepting the nice words and he kept telling me how great I looked, and all I could think is "you are my brother, of course you say that.." I know that I need to be better at accepting compliments and being positive, but all I can think is that I still have so much to lose and I don't want anyone to know how much I have lost (i.e. those not in my inner circle) or how much I still have to lose because the number I have lost is half of many people and I am still overweight and have a lot more to go despite this number..My brother was shocked/frustrated at this..he kept pointing out that I should be celebrating what I have done, my improvement and where I am going...he even made some comparisons to picking stocks (two finance geeks..). I know he is right and I am proud of myself and am excited for where I am going..I know I am hard on myself and it will be something that I will need to improve upon going forward...We talked about so much (guys, dating, perception of heavier people, etc)....so open and honest...I am definitely going to have to post about some of the other things later..

I did well on the eating front and am determined to make this week a great one...in the spirit of some others posting goals, here are some goals for the week:
*No pasta (for some reason I have been eating so much pasta lately and I generally try to avoid very high carb foods)
*Drink 64 oz of water (this is tough for me but I know how important it is)
*Make quality food choices at all meals and avoid mindless snacking
*go to the gym at least twice for cardio (the one thing I have totally been missing is exercise and this is something I know I need to conquer/focus on). This is in addition to Pilates
*Avoid Desserts (again, have been doing a lot of desserts/sweets lately, which is not my norm)..
*Blog every day, if even for quick posts..(excited to use the new blogger app)

I have already done well on the avoid dessert choice..I was craving something sweet after lunch today and one of the girls on my team got engaged so I decided my desk should get cupcakes (Magnolia cupcakes..i.e. from Sex and the City..to die for..)..So, I took orders and went. On the way over, I was asking myself if the cupcake was worth it? I decided I would only eat half, but by the time I got to Magnolia, I decided I would skip it...it was tough as I watched everyone eat it but I felt very happy / proud that I resisted...

Below are a few highlight pics from the weekend and dinner!